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Peculiar MLB Injuries

Spring baseball – can you feel it? The crack of the bat. The cut of the grass. The sniper of the sprinkler head and the perils of getting out of a pool. Weirdest thing coming out of Spring Training- MLBers are getting injured in peculiar fashion! Just once, I wish we could hear that a dude pulled his hammy rounding second. Instead, it’s Toronto outfielder Mike Saunders jacks his knee stepping on a sprinkler head.

An outfielder injuring his shoulder going into the wall I could understand. But Rays reliever Ronald Bellisario fracturing his shoulder getting out of a swimming pool? How come liquored morons on YouTube can jump off their roof into a pool without breaking themselves, but an MLBer can’t even climb up the steps in the shallow end. Because it never ends. There must be some quota for whack injuries they need to meet every spring. Chicago’s Chris Sale just did his part. He’s one of the best pitchers in the AL, and he just fractured his foot stepping off his truck. What?? Was that truck doing 80 at the time?? Chris- get one of those SkyMall truck ramps for dogs. I’m sure they’re on sale. And now Sale’s on the Marty Cordova All-Star Team.

Sure we always hear about NFLers getting arrested in the offseason, but at least they don’t get injured under sunlamps. Gentlemen- Clint Barmes has some venison that needs hauling, Wade Boggs needs a hand pulling on his cowboy boots, and former Brewer Steve Sparks would love some help tearing a phone book in half. Jeff Kent jacking himself up “washing his mini-monster pick up truck” can’t believe Chris Sale got hurt stepping off one.

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