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Get In The Fight, Dwight

Are you getting the shakes because you’re missing the Madness? Breaking out in night sweats from withdrawal from your bracket? Flip on the Beard and watch the Rockets.

If you just squint your eyes and pretend you hear Jim Nantz, watching Houston feels like watching the Big Dance. Because Houston is the sneaky 3-Seed flying under the radar of the 1’s, cruising through the field nice and quiet. The only reason they pop up on the doppler and trend on Twitter is because they’ve got that one guard who puts them on their back through the bracket. Kemba Walker for UConn. Stephen Curry for Davidson. And Weird Beard for the Rockets. All this mixtape is missing is Big Bill Raftery on the call.

ONIONS!!!!!!!* NYLON!!! WITH A KISS!!! SEND IT IN JAMES!!! Hit the fight song, the Rockets student section is going ballistic after that one.

All you NBA Bracketologists don’t sleep on Clutch City. They’ve beaten Memphis twice. Cleveland twice. The Mavs. The Clips. They could cut down some nets, if only they had an athletic big man to protect the rim.

I know he got hurt two months ago, but Has ANYBODY seen Dwight Howard since???? His Coach Kevin McHale has. And he’s about to drag him off the bench. “We may have to start just throwing him out there…He’s gotta start playing here pretty soon.”

Hey big man – -you never played college ball. Joining Jimmy Beard on this run is the closest you’ll ever come to the tournament. I love watching Harden, but Houston needs a double order of Onions.

Get in the fight, Dwight.

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