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Cubs Introduce Wacky Joe Maddon

Half of Chicago is hungover on a Tuesday. The party raged late in Wrigleyville after the Cubs introduced their new icon.

How does wacky Joe Maddon get beleaguered bleacher bums eating out of his hand from the word Go? With the one thing they love most: Alcohol.

Maddon set up shop for his presser at the Cubby Bear Bar….he ended it by buying shots and beers for everybody there… And frankly he showed up with the look of somebody who’d already had a few. With a frumpy, unbuttoned, bespeckled, silver-haired bed head look. Of course the fans loved him – he looked like Harry Caray.

And then he pops his gap and starts saying things like he wants the players to work less and enjoy the game more…and that he met with the Cubs brass on his RV…an RV he’s glossed “Cousin Eddie”…. Oh, and he wants to live in the city and not some gated community…. And then best of all, he calls his shot for 2015.

Sure they haven’t won a world series in over a century. But that right there is the most exciting Cubs moment in a decade. That’s the most worked up I’ve seen the northsiders since they were coming for Bartman.

And there are plenty of reasons for them to be jacked. The Cubs’ wallet is fat. Their farm system is loaded. And their new manager looked like he was too. Doesn’t matter. Skip could park Cousin Eddie on Addison overnight and they wouldn’t even ticket him. He hasn’t won a single game as manager, but based on one presser… Wacky Joe could run for mayor.

Don’t get me wrong, it’ll probably be another hundred years before y’all win a ring. But seeing crazy Joe roll out of the rack and heading straight to the confines will win over Wrigley.